Just An Ordinary Day

In the play "Our Town", one of the characters

gets the chance to choose one day

to go back to. To re-live.

I remember the author's writing that described the character

as an observer of an ordinary day in her life.

If I were given the opportunity to go back, observe,

enjoy, just one day out of my life,

I would choose the day that we

went to the Bronx Zoo.

Not because it was a holiday, a birthday, a wedding.
Not because it was any different than any other
day. I would go back because it was
such an ordinary day.
Our lives had yet to be touched with mortality.
It was the last time that we were
all together, before life
was shadowed with cancer.
With death.
We spent a whole day together.
We walked through the zoo and enjoyed
each other's company. We met my
brother. We ate lunch.
We laughed.
The weather was perfect. We had so much
fun.
We thought there would be a million more
days like that one.
Less than one month after that trip to the
zoo, we found out my Mom was dying.
On that day, she wasn't dying.
We weren't hurting.
We weren't healing.
We were a family that was whole.
If I could go back, just for the day,
I would enjoy it more.
I would savour the time that we shared.
Some how I would make the day last longer.
I would slow down and enjoy it more.
It's funny how an ordinary day, spent with
loved ones, can become such a special
memory.
I'm so thankful that we shared that day together.
I'm so thankful that we had that time.
One thing that my Mother's illness and death has
taught me is how finite life is.
How you just never know when the ordinary
may become the extraordinary.

Good-bye

Good-bye Tim and Dad.

Thanks for the visit.

Hurry back! We'll be waiting

for you.

A Visit From Dubai

About six months ago, my brother left for Dubai.

I was not happy. My Mother was kind and

understanding. I hoped that when he came

back, Mom would still be here to listen

to all he had to tell about

his time.

She wasn't.

This week, my brother is home on vacation.

He chose to come up here to spend time

with the kids. Shortly before she died,

my Mom shared with him how much

he meant to the kids. He listened. He's done a lot

to make himself available to be with the Big K. and Doodles.

One evening, after dinner, he brought out all sorts of stuff that

he brought with him from Dubai.

He showed them maps and money.

He explained what each coin meant and what it was worth.

He showed them where he lives

in Dubai, and told them about the weather and the people.

The kids were fascinated. They sat for almost two hours listening

to everything he told them. They asked about

a million questions, and he

took the time to answer each and every one.

He also brought them special presents

that he'd picked out just for them.

He told them why he chose each gift, and where

the gifts had come from.
The Big K. loves animals, and Tio picked out a hand

carved camel with a baby camel inside. The wood was palm tree

wood. I found out, that that's the only type of trees there are in Dubai.

He also brought the Big K. a box with a snake

in it. You hit a button, the snake pops out.

He brought Doodles bunches of bracelets.

He explained how they

were made and where he found them.

He also gave her a ring. He answered all of her questions about the ring

and the stone inside. The gifts were perfect.

The visit was wonderful and bitter sweet.

I couldn't help but think how much my Mom would have loved to

hear about Tim's travels. She would have loved

to see the coins and the gifts he brought for us.

Most of all, she would have been so proud of him. Proud of him

for remembering how important he is to the kids, how much

they love him, and how needed he is.

I was so very happy to be able to spend the time with him.

Thank you for coming home Tim. I can't wait to see you again in

six months.

What I Miss

I miss:

Your laugh, your smile,

your hugs.

I miss:

Talking with you all afternoon, all evening,

all night.

I miss:

Shopping with you,

debating with you, planning with you.

I miss:

Every single thing about you. I'm greedy

for more of you.

I wish I could see you, hold you, smell you,

hear you, sing with you, spend just a little more time with you.

Mom, I miss you.

His Strength Is Perfect

Adopting older children has been one of

the most rewarding experiences of my life.

It has also been one of the most challenging.

Our children were four and five when we met them.

They had memories and experiences in

their lives that happened before they met us.

They had pains and joys that we never shared.

Our first year with them was very, very challenging.

Before we met them, they were considered hard to place.

That label was because of their age, race, and behaviors.

There were many times, that first year, when

I wondered what on earth we were doing.

There were times when I wondered if we had made a mistake,

if we should send them back, if pets might be a better

option. Each time the Lord provided

the strength I lacked.

Each time, God would remind me that He gave me my

children. He had a purpose for their lives and

for our family. He brought all of us through that

first year. He daily renewed my strength.

Behaviors continued, but not as many and not as frequently.

This past month has been very hard with the kids. They've reverted

into a lot of their old behaviors. I'm already at the end

of my rope emotionally, and there are days

when I feel like I can't hold on. There are days,

like today, when I again ask God, "Maybe pets really

would have been a better option for us. Maybe

you made a mistake."

Today, he gently reminded me that

His strength is perfect, when my strength is gone.

I was reminded, again, that God makes no mistakes, that

this time will pass. That one day these dark days will be over, and

that the children He brought to us were the right

children for us. How thankful I am for my

Heavenly Father and for the two children

that He brought into my life. What a gift

they are.

Afternoon Nap

Afternoon at our house.
I loved finding the cat in the blanket.
Don't they all look comfortable.

Monday Muffins

After we were married, and Mom knew

we were going to become parents, she gave me one

of her favorite cookbooks. She'd used it

a lot when we were growing up.

We simply called it "Then Mennonite Cookbook"

or "The Mennonite" for short.

It's a GREAT cookbook with lots of cost

saving ways to cook. Mennonites don't believe

in waste. One of the recipes

in the cookbook is for English Muffins.

I've never made them, but I thought I would try today.

I used whole wheat flour, and they were very easy

to make.
Here is the recipe:
Heat in a saucepan until very warm (130):
1 1/2c. milk
1/4c. butter
In large mixer bowl, combine:
2T. sugar
1t. salt
1pkg. dry yeast
1 1/2 c. flour
With mixer at low speed, gradually beat liquid
into dry ingredients. Increase speed and beat 2 minutes.
Beat in:
1 egg
1c. flour
With a spoon add:
2c. flour, or enough to make stiff dough
Turn dough onto lightly floured surface and knead
jut until well mixed, about
2 minutes. Shape dough into a ball and place in large greased bowl.
Cover and let rise until double in size.
Punch dough down, cover with bowl and let dough rest for
about fifteen minutes. Roll the dough out and cut with biscuit cutter.
Place dough rounds onto a cookie sheet, cover and let rise until
double in size. Once double, heat a skillet on medium.
Fry each side for about eight minutes, or until brown.
Remove from heat, split with a fork, and enjoy.
We're saving our English Muffins for breakfast
tomorrow morning. Hopefully they will taste
as good as they smell.